Backport ALPN to v4.x LTS

Checklist

• make -j4 test (UNIX), or vcbuild test (Windows) passes
• tests and/or benchmarks are included
• documentation is changed or added
• commit message follows commit guidelines

Affected core subsystem(s)

tls,crypto

As listed in https://github.com/nodejs/LTS/issues/177, this backports the ALPN feature to v4.x LTS by cherry-picking four commits of 802a2e79, 7eee3725, 65030c77 and c26b9af1 from v6-staging with resolving several conflicts.

/CC @nodejs/crypto @MylesBorins